There is an art to conversation. My problem is that I never was good at art. I mean, I can be very creative, but it doesn't seem to be turned on all the time; and it takes a lot of work. As for conversation, I enjoy talking to people, but when it comes to getting one started, I seem to sometimes falter. I don't want it to come off like a job interview. Then again, I also don't want to talk about myself... well I do, because it's easy and it the subject I know most about, but I know better than that.
On another note, it's difficult to converse with someone who gives one word answers and doesn't ask any questions back. What do you do if that happens? Does it mean they don't want to talk to you? Are they simply not good at communicating? *sigh*
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Grateful
My blog posts are usually sporadic because I often don't think what I have to say is of much consequence, so I only write when prompted to... usually by emotion. Today I started off writing just to write, I didn't have anything in particular to say, but once again, it turned into a post prompted by emotion.
I am grateful.
Although there are so many reasons to be stressed out right now, I am grateful for my life.
-I am grateful that I'm a little overweight: I'm not going hungry. I often get disparaged over the fight to keep my weight down, but realize that I could be starving and have no choice about what I eat.
-I am thankful for the opportunities we get to serve. There are many lists that go around during church and I have made a goal this month to sign up for all of them if I don't have anything scheduled during that time already.
-I am grateful for so many friends. According to facebook I have 771. I remember in elementary school I would come home crying because I just wanted 1.
-I am grateful for where I am in life. Not many people my age have a couple of houses and have traveled the world. I am very blessed to have done all this and so much more already. I am also grateful to know what I want out of life and where I am going.
-I am thankful for my trials. I know that they help build and shape me into the person God wants me to be. It's good to be grateful for them right now, because sometimes, it's hard to see that when the light is dim.
I am grateful.
Although there are so many reasons to be stressed out right now, I am grateful for my life.
-I am grateful that I'm a little overweight: I'm not going hungry. I often get disparaged over the fight to keep my weight down, but realize that I could be starving and have no choice about what I eat.
-I am thankful for the opportunities we get to serve. There are many lists that go around during church and I have made a goal this month to sign up for all of them if I don't have anything scheduled during that time already.
-I am grateful for so many friends. According to facebook I have 771. I remember in elementary school I would come home crying because I just wanted 1.
-I am grateful for where I am in life. Not many people my age have a couple of houses and have traveled the world. I am very blessed to have done all this and so much more already. I am also grateful to know what I want out of life and where I am going.
-I am thankful for my trials. I know that they help build and shape me into the person God wants me to be. It's good to be grateful for them right now, because sometimes, it's hard to see that when the light is dim.
Wednesday, May 05, 2010
Why Do I Panic? -Part 2-
In 2006 I wrote a post titled: "Why do I Panic?" I have recently revisited that post have some new thoughts on it.
When I wrote this post, I had someone specifically in mind that I was talking about. And yes, it was also a general post on some level. I look at it now and realize that I've grown a lot when it comes to relationships. I think a majority of this is due to my broken engagement and the growth it forced me garner.
I'm not a coward by any means. I am grateful to know who I am and where I am headed and I generally think I know what I want from life. My confidence has definitely been strengthened infinitely since that last post in 2006.
Now, do I still panic when talking to an attractive girl? Absolutely. Do I have a hard time calling someone on the phone for a date? Yes. But I've learned that I simply have to push through it. I have to push through the fear, the anxiety, and the temptation to blurt out everything that I'm feeling. I've also recognized that I feel more at home when I feel like I'm in control of the scenario, which is why I don't do so well in a room full of strangers. (I also think this is one of the reasons I do theater: the room full of strangers, over time, becomes a room full of new friends.)
Sometimes, I wait too long to take action. Or least I over analyze it and believe it to have been too long... but there I go again, thinking of someone specific. Anyway, this is one thing I hope to work on: Taking dating opportunities before they disappear. And who knows, maybe past opportunities will be re-presented to me. If they are, I WILL take them this time.
So, I've dove from dizzifying heights in front of hundreds of people while wearing nothing but a loincloth. I've traveled the world. I've lived in a foreign country at the poverty level among the natives. I've performed in countless plays, including one with an audience of thousands where once again, I was in a loincloth (hmm... I see a pattern developing). I've talked to strangers on the phone, convincing them to give my company their money. I've taught Real Estate in front of audiences of thousands. All of this I did with nerves of steel.
So why is it that when I have a crush on a girl, or find her remotely attractive, I have the hardest time speaking to her? Why do I begin to panic inside? Why can't I just come out and say, "I think you are beautiful and talented. May I have the honor of taking you out to dinner?"
I even plan things to say and do I say them? No. I panic. My mind goes blank and all I do is keep quiet or laugh.
When I wrote this post, I had someone specifically in mind that I was talking about. And yes, it was also a general post on some level. I look at it now and realize that I've grown a lot when it comes to relationships. I think a majority of this is due to my broken engagement and the growth it forced me garner.
I'm not a coward by any means. I am grateful to know who I am and where I am headed and I generally think I know what I want from life. My confidence has definitely been strengthened infinitely since that last post in 2006.
Now, do I still panic when talking to an attractive girl? Absolutely. Do I have a hard time calling someone on the phone for a date? Yes. But I've learned that I simply have to push through it. I have to push through the fear, the anxiety, and the temptation to blurt out everything that I'm feeling. I've also recognized that I feel more at home when I feel like I'm in control of the scenario, which is why I don't do so well in a room full of strangers. (I also think this is one of the reasons I do theater: the room full of strangers, over time, becomes a room full of new friends.)
Sometimes, I wait too long to take action. Or least I over analyze it and believe it to have been too long... but there I go again, thinking of someone specific. Anyway, this is one thing I hope to work on: Taking dating opportunities before they disappear. And who knows, maybe past opportunities will be re-presented to me. If they are, I WILL take them this time.