I've Got a Yolk for You

This morning I have been humbled. I had not only one, but two boiled eggs explode in my face today
I was at the concierge and needed protein. All they had was cold boiled eggs. Cold eggs make me gag, so I heated three of them in the provided microwave. I was careful to cut slits in them and cover them so they wouldn't explode in the microwave. They seemed fine, but when I went to separate the yolks from the whites: SPLAT! Yolk everywhere!
"Wow, I've never seen an egg do that before." Commented the concierge attendant. Little did she know, it wasn't over. I made an attempt to wipe up some of the mess, but only managed to grind it into the table.
I began a slow attack of the second egg with my fork, this time covering it with my hand. The funny thing about this action is that when an object ricochets off of an object that close, it seems to send it farther, thus making a ginormous mess. And as the hot yellow substance came in contact with my hand, I felt not only the pain from the heat, but I think I also heard a chuckle from the attendant. My degradation was complete. I feigned wiping up the mess once again, humbly finished my breakfast and then left a nice tip on the table right before I slipped out of the room drawing as little attention as possible.